Trick or treat

Mostly tricks for me tonight. We were doing a new drill where you had to juke through a giant pack while still cutting to both the inside and outside lines. It was fine, but then there was a bit of a pileup. Chatterbox fell and took out RayWoWW, and they were both behind me and I was like "yeah I can get out of the way" and then the next minute I was flat on my back on the ground. Two things hurt like the dickens: my butt, and my right hand. I had to stop skating and that was the end of practice for me. Sadface.

Foreground: fingers taped together for sprain.
Background: bag of ice on cushioned chair.

Gritz got me some ice and I spent my time alternating between icing my hand and sitting on a giant ziploc bag of ice. I think two of my fingers are sprained or jarred or something because I fell awkwardly my hand, but I can bend them a bit, so nothing broken there, I am sure. The butt is a whole other story. I have to be really slow with sitting and getting up and putting weight on it sucks. I am sitting on a bag of ice right now. I tried to shower before and even stepping into the shower (over the lip of the tub) resulted in a load of cussing and shit. Also because my hand is munted I couldn't shampoo my hair properly. Argh.

Apparently what happened was that  Chatter fell and as she did her leg came up and took me out. I'm not sure how: either she kicked me square in the butt as she was falling, or I fell and landed square on her skate. Either way, there was butt-to-skate contact and it was hard.

Anyway, this is what my facebook status says now:

Trick: I might have broken my ass (literally) at derby.
Treat: I am getting an awesome bruise.
Trick: I can't show anyone because of its inappropriate location.

Because I am pretty sure I can't post a picture of it here either without violating Blogger's terms of service, let me describe it for you: I am starting to get a bruise on my ass, right at the base of my spine where my spine intersects with my pelvis, basically at the top of my ass crack. And then the bruise goes INTO MY ASS CRACK AND ON EITHER SIDE ON MY BUTT CHEEKS. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK.

I'm sure you all just had to think about my butt. I'm sorry. I will have it checked out but apparently there's nothing doctors can do for a broken tailbone? Also I have a conference to go to tomorrow which means sitting on a plane for the whole day, and then sitting for two days after that. Fuck. Also this post took over an hour to write because I can only use one hand. Happy Halloween.