Thursday 29 September 2011

Cross Promotion

The university Harry Potter club (yes, we have one of those) invited people from the league to participate in their Quidditch Grand Final. Haha. Yes. I’ve been in charge with liaising with the HPC people. Most of the league is super excited about it and we’ve already made a team for their Quodpot half time show for when we compete against the Uni Dragons. My worlds are colliding! I’m super geeked by this. Anyway, introducing:

The Prisoners of Smashkaban!

Starring:
Hermione Gouger (Boudica)
Golden Snatch (Me)
Pop goes the Weasley (Junk)
Professor Rumblewhore (Rubi)
Luna Loveblood (Legz)
Minerva Mc-Gonna-Kill (Lauren)
Quidbitch (Bubbles)

We also came up with a shitload of awesome other HP derby-esque names:
Rubi S. Hagrid
Fluffy (Derby number 3, of course)
Annie Magus
Nimbus-ter 2000
I am aware that this is a skateboard but imagine trying to get tiny quads on Hedwig.
 Godric Griffinwhore
Whore Crux
Die Agonally
Rolldemort
Voldemorticia
Ava D. Kedavra
Abra-cadaver
Draco Kapow-foy
Batter beer
Hairy Plotter
Dumbleclaw
Fire whipski
Calf-blood Prince
Dobby the snout pelt
The snorting twat
Hell-grr Huffle-punt
Salazar Slit-her-skin
Mad-Eye Poon-i
MaxiPadfoot

I think I have just made the most complete HP list of derby names that exists on the internet at the moment.

And we’re going to go full out in boutfits and warpaint, to scare off the Dragon Boating boys. Plus apparently Quodpot is full contact so we can hipcheck the shit out of the Dragon Boaters. Haha. I love us so much. 

White Star plus

Last week there was a CRDL bout and that was super awesome. I’ll write more about the bout later. What was less awesome was that after the bout Sarge pulled me and Boudie over and said that we (and Pitts, who wasn’t at the bout) were going to get reassessed for our white stars to see if we can qualify to test for yellows. Yellows are important, because that’s when you get to scrimmage and everything.

I need like 357328562378 of these.
Holy shitballs. I am really bad with assessments. In fact, I was REALLY bad with this one. I went home early so I could get a good night’s sleep beforehand and then Boudica and I were going to skate early before we got assessed. Haha. Yeah, and then I woke up at FRIGGIN THREE THIRTY IN THE MORNING and couldn’t get back to sleep. What the fuck. Anyway, we had a skate up in Baldie (our favourite multistorey parking lot) and worked on some things, like crossing and (hilariously for me) being sufficiently relaxed to drag my knuckles on the ground pretty much.

I fucked up T-stops like 6 times. I just kept spinning in a circle and that was fucking frustrating. Gah. But then the lovely Marie showed me how to do it! The reason I was spinning out was because on my back foot I was putting too much weight on my inside wheel. So all I had to do was put more weight on my outside wheels on the back of the T and OMG! Now I know how to T-stop!!!! :D:D:D I need to practice them more but I totally got the idea after she explained it to me. And that’s one thing that’s awesome about derby: people will explain how to do things in like 1000 different ways, and you’ll eventually find one that clicks with you. Yeah. :D

Still need to work more on crossovers, but I passed! WEWT! And Boudie did too!!

Our yellow star test is next Sunday. EEEEP!

White Star!!

Since we’d been skating for a bit now, last night Sarge surprised us all with roller disco for everyone, and white star testing for most people. WTF. I really do shit under assessment pressure. Prior to this, we had our own system of sorting “freshmen” and “sophomores” (we’re using a college theme for our league. Other leagues sometimes use pirates or military or whatever). Basically, there it was Sarge watching us skate and seeing how we were with stability, having proper derby stance, fitness, etc. I realy sucked at derby stance when I started. I was so frigging upright I probably should have been a figure skater (or, at least off-skates someone without joints in their legs). Haha. So when we got sorted into Freshies and Sophies I didn’t make the cut. And that was kind of gutting. But it turned out that my non-lesbian-equivalent-of-a-derby-wife (or rather, more like derby BFF) Boudica didn’t make the cut either, and we had the same kinds of things to work on, so yeah. We have a pretty long-runinng joke now where we are “Team Nanna” because when we started we used to skate around and hip check like geriatrics.

So, instead of doing the Freshie/Sophies thing, we switched over to the star rating, which is what people use normally in Australia. So CRDL uses it, I think the Sydney leagues do, Victoria RDL does, etc. For the uninitiated, the star ranking gives you a different color star depending on how derby-ready you are. Without stars you’re fresh meat, a white star means you’re getting basic derby skills, a yellow one means you can do some kind of scrimmaging or something, orange means you can be drafted onto a league and scrimmage with big girls, and green is like you’re some kind of skating superstar and you can get onto the all-star team or something like that. I’m not sure what the actual designations are, but it’s something like that. Another CRDL friend (Lee Wrecks) recently got her orange, and the main thing for her there was that she could get drafted, and I think you actually do full-contact scrimmage there.

Interestingly, these are the things I suck most at on my assessment.
And I had a pretty rough idea of what goes into white star testing. CRDL’s November tryouts had a list of minimum skills you needed, like stops and falls and how many pushups and situps you could do and stuff, and I think that was based on the star test. So I wasn’t super worried, although I DO like to do well on tests. :P

Anyway, Rubi was my tester, and I had to do T-stops on both feet (FUCK I HATE T-STOPS), a plow stop, 20 situps (it’s supposed to be 10 situps and 10 pushups but I have a crap shoulder so I got to do 20 situps, only I ended up doing 23 because I can’t count), a lap of sticky skating, weaving through cones, crossovers, a thing where you had to do walk forwards, backwards and sideways on skates without falling over, 1 and 2-knee falls (others had to do 4-point, but again, shoulder), and glides. Like, when you skate on one foot in the straight bit of the track.

I think I did okay, except I fucked up one of my t-stops (I started going in a circle instead of stopping, but then I eventually stopped) and apparently I need to swing my arms more(?) when I skate. And crossovers need to be more “fluid”. But I passed!! Woooooot! And what’s more was I was in the first group of 3 to get tested, so that was pretty much a big relief. Then the rest of the time was just social skating until everyone else was done testing.

The start

So, welcome to my blog. I’ve been meaning to write a blog for a while now, so I guess now I will (probably because this is actually a fit of procrastination, but whatevs).

I’ve been skating for about 4 months now, maybe. A couple of girls at my university started a league at the beginning of the year because the only other league in town (Canberra Roller Derby League) had like a 400-person waiting list or something. I’m on their mailing list, and they are having tryouts in November.

I’ve wanted to do derby for a while, even before I bought my first pair of skates and whatnot. I lived in the US a few years ago and derby was just taking off there when I was leaving. And then I went to the premiere of “Whip It” (NOTE: not the actual movie, just the fancy premiere thingy) at the Toronto International Film Festival. And they had a flat-track derby bout thing in the middle of Dundas Square (which, for those of you who don’t know, is a big square right in the middle of the downtown area). It was pretty awesome. To the untrained eye it seriously just looked like a bunch of women skating around in a circle and punching each other or something. So I thought that looked pretty cool. Then, back in Canberra, the then-boyfriend and I went to a bout between the Canberra all-star Vice City Rollers and the ladies from Sydney RDL in December. It was pretty epic. He was really into it, and when I managed to understand the rules I was like, “oh yeah, this is pretty cool”. I used to play hockey, and to some extent this had the same kind of fast-and-violent disposition about it that I liked.

That night all we could talk about was what my derby name would be. I wanted something that would suggest that I was small and fast, so I picked “Pocket Rocket”. Yep. (Later, I would find out that was taken, and I went through like 6 names before I settled on my current one. Gah. Picking a derby name is hard!)

I liked my first session so much that I wore my skates at work for a week.
And then I procrastinated for like 4 whole months wondering if I could actually do derby. Then one day the then-boyfriend (henceforth TBF) and I were walking across campus and we saw a bunch of people learning how to skate in the courtyard in the middle of the campus. And I was like, “yeah, I can do that”. So I jumped on their mailing list, and lo and behold I found out that they were doing a mass fresh meat purchase from Sydney Derby Skates with a huge discount. I love huge discounts. I managed to squeeze in a late order and then next week I had my awesome Riedell Diablos, and all the padding I could ever want. My friend McSmack skates with CRDL, and she came to our session too. It was probably WAY too basic for her, but it was nice to have someone there that I actually knew. :)

Anyway, I can’t really remember too much about what happened in those early days. There were only a handful of us, and we were being trained by Marie Slamtoinette from Central Coast Roller Girls. Marie had to leave CCRG because she moved to Canberra. Then, a newspaper article went out about how we had our own league and way more people joined, including Drool Sergeant, who is like a proper derby coach guy and actually used to train the CRDL girls. So that was a bit of a scoop. Sarge still trains us and Marie now trains the noobs a bit. There’s also a whole bunch of other people from those early days who have stuck around that I could talk about, but I’m sure that will come out in other entries.