The Cannery Challenge, 2012

VDL has a team called the Dishonour Rollers. It's the rep/travel team, although the furthest it's travelled so far is to the other side of Canberra. It's made up of some amazing skaters. They're fast and hit hard. And they're coming out to play tomorrow at CRDL's Cannery Challenge. Basically, the CC is where CRDL hosts a bunch of teams and there's a series of bouts (or half-bouts) so we can meet other teams and whatnot.

I'm not unfamiliar with the Dishonour Rollers. I went to the first Cannery Challenge last year. I had provisionally made the first DR team ever, but then I stupidly wrecked my ankle and couldn't skate and benched instead. And that might have been a good thing because a lot of people got injured. (I wrote about it here.)

Then there was the TGSS team bound for Adelaide, and I was on that but we had to pull the entire team out due to injury and insufficient numbers.

Then there was another CC earlier this year, but I was overseas.

But tomorrow, I am going to be a Dishonour Roller. And I mean, actually skate as a Dishonour Roller. I'm excited, but at the same time, I am fucking terrified.

YES PLEASE.

It's my first bout, or bout-type thing, and I'm on the rep team? WTF. What a place to start. Everyone else on the team has bouted before, so I guess the whole first-bout-ever jitters don't really work for them. But yeah. I sometimes wonder how I got here; I mean, the rest of the team consists of either really fast jammers, really strong giant wall blockers, or pivots that actually understand game strategy and can employ it. I'm not fast (or I can be off the jammer line because I've improved my footwork when I was overseas, but I get held up in the pack. There's a lovely video of me somewhere on the internet where I take off from the jammer line really quick, and skate straight into Rubi Doom's butt and fall down. Ha). I can't really hit hard, although I much prefer positional blocking someone than hitting them and possibly getting majored or injured or whatever. And I have some REALLY minimal conception of derby strategy. I watch the videos and stuff on youtube, but they might as well be speaking French to me. (I actually understand French, but not enough that I can process it as fast as a native speaker, so you get my drift.) For someone almost done with a Ph.D., I can't get my brain to work for derby purposes. So yeah, it's no wonder that I'm just a little bit nervous.

Yes, yes, before you get all "you shouldn't worry about it because you made the team so you must be good and whatever", I guess I'm self-doubting because I've never actually tested my mettle in the field, as it were. Training and scrimmage at VDL is one thing because it's like, hitting your friends and you know how they react to stuff and what their strengths and weaknesses are. Hitting strangers is a different thing. Especially strangers who have frigging represented Australia at Blood and Thunder. In a way, I want to hit someone who meets that description, to say that I did. I'm sure that tomorrow night I'll be all like "WHOO THAT WAS SO AWESOME" but now, I'm just a bit bleh. Stupid nerves. Winning the afterparty might be an option though. I'll probably need a drink or two.

This shouldn't suggest that I plan to lose the bout.
I'm just planning to not lose the after party.

 My goal tomorrow consists of one thing: TRY NOT TO DIE.

(Subsidiary goals: do some good positional blocking, maybe even hit someone, maybe get through the pack and score at least one point if I get to jam)

Also, I have a list of things I would like to not injure, in order of highest preference of "it is crucial that this thing works" to "meh, I guess I can recover from that":

• My brain. If I get any sort of head injury, I can't do my Ph.D.. And I need to do my Ph.D.
• My hands/wrists/arms. How the hell do I type a dissertation if someone's broken all my fingers by skating over them?
• My pretty face. Well, not really, but you know. Also, I would really like to keep all my teeth.
• Ankles. I have TWO cruddy ankles already, and they will be taped up as much as they can. Also, no blisters on my ankles would be nice.
• Knees. That shit hurts, but not as bad as ankles.
• I can deal with bruises. Just no lacerations or shit. It's a bit rude to bleed all over someone else's nice derby track. Also, I will try very hard not to vomit everywhere.

The team's meeting for breakfast tomorrow, and then we're going to do some ass kicking after that. It's an all day event, so I'll try to update on Sunday or Monday or whatever. I will see you on the other side.